The great unknown... and I mean GREAT

I have been having lots of pain lately but I am believer in the better you look(and know that you look!)makes you feel a little better. Even though it obviously isn't a cure, it makes your outlook on life a little better even when everything else is dimmed due to pain. For me, it was an unknown like outer space...but I am willing to try anything to make me feel physically or mentally better.

Like I said in my previous post I really like the old style pin up look, so I looked online for easy pin up hairdo styles. I took my meds... instead of being drowsy and ready for bed, I was alert. Which then led me to trying one of the hairstyles, looked good.... what about makeup? Tried that too and turned out pretty well. Going for the whole neutral eye with black liquid liner with a flare to it and some bright lips... and I'm super pale by complexion so it was a winning match! Why haven't I tried this sooner?! I felt so pretty, I am a plus sized gal not by choice but by meds, I have learned that whether its by choice or not I should be proud of myself whether I am size 0 or size 30 shouldn't matter! I tried on some dresses to wear for St Patty's day dinner where I was going to meet with my parents. I looked damn good! I felt like I probably looked a little overdressed but I was excited to show the new "me". Plus I didn't tell anyone about this besides hubby.

True Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

Today it was rainy and windy so the dress was now out of the picture... but I still did my hair and makeup! I even had D notice that I looked "spruced" up. It was nice to have someone notice me, even if it was a relative. I feel like so many people think that just because a woman is larger means they cant look good, if you're pretty ....you are pretty, that's all there is to it. I hope I don't sound to conceded but I am just so excited about this. Even though I was in pain today and had to talk about the whole B situation, I felt very positive, and I think I came off that way too which is nice.

I am still hoping for relief with all of these symptoms. I have also been thinking about that last doctor appt where they gave me meds and how it seemed odd that since my hubby was there things were different. I am starting to believe that maybe its just the whole "family element". Maybe since he saw me interacting with my husband/LO like a regular person, maybe that was more relate-able or something. That's all I can think of, besides that maybe he knows that when a husband is there that they cant treat the wife like crap... don't know.

I really feel good and free mentally... it makes me so happy and I hope this lasts. I have eliminated lots of sources of stress and its REALLY nice... like sitting on a beach with a mixed drink nice. That would be amazing right about now, wouldn't it?