Feels like getting robbed....ALL THE TIME

I have been trying to think of ways to explain what my extreme pain from my endo is like. Plus the fact that I feel like I just keep going through the same things and no one is willing to go the extra mile and really figure everything out.

Its like living in a bad neighbor hood where maybe there is one or two certain people for whatever reason or non-reason are out to get you or just ruin your life. You never know when they are coming for you, if you'll be home or if you will just come home to a ransacked house. Once it happens and they attack you, you are on guard all the time just waiting for it to happen again. Then you try and live your life maybe even move on.... BAM it happens again when you least expect it. You try and report it to the police but they just wont listen they tell you there is no evidence or that you are just nuts or they are friends with these people so it could not be true. Sometimes you are scared for your life when it happens and then after multiple times of it happening to you, you start wishing you were dead. Its hard to not be able to live your life and move on at some point, but you must always have some kind of anxiety because you need to be on guard you don't have a choice, no one else believes you or is willing to help you. Its just you and these "people".

Kind of looks like some of the docs Ive seen...

The difference between that and chronic pain is eventually you would get fed up and either move or go buy a gun and get some vigilante justice... whereas with chronic pain there is no justice unless you are lucky enough to have bunches of money to travel to where they have experts who care enough to see through that you end up feeling better.

I want some fucking justice. I am in so much pain. This is probably the worst period Ive had since being with my husband so that's a while. I am off of my birth control so to me that says this is my endo and not some other bullshit. Ive went down EVERY other possible avenue all the docs asked me to, Ive had all the horrible tests they wanted to do.... yet here I am back at the same place. Being beaten down in a bad neighborhood with the cops doing nothing. If only I could move out of my body.... after all its not a nice neighborhood anymore and hasn't been for a while, not even a good view.